On love lost and gained

At the outset, my apologies to " friendson" for dealing on a subject where in he has portrayed hardly few hrs back , some observations ,( some of which may be contrary to views expressed herein ), published under his blog"transientlines @blogspot.com".

His post on "love, wisdom and such silly things", i admit, has given rise to the thoughts in this post.

I am reminded of the famour writer Sujatha, who boldly advocated in his novels that love is nothing but the chemistry of harmones in the body.I am also reminded of JEYA KANTHAN who narrated in his writings as to how people are hypocritic in not admitting that love leads to desire and desire leads to lust and as such they are inseparable and coexist.Then came BALA KUMARAN WITH HIS POWERFUL WRITINGS, MORE INCLINED TO PORTARYING THE WOMEN'S SIDE THAN THE MAN'S SIDE WHO CLAIMED that in all cases of crisis arising on account of love, it is only woman who are left high and dry.Now the issue is not as to who is right or who is wrong. The issue is primarily aimed at anlaysing whether we are reALLY grown up and matured to analyse our own reactions to love and hate.WHAT EVER HAS BEEN SAID BY THE WRITERS REFERRD TO BY ME AND THOSE ABOUT WHOM I HAVE NOT REFEERED (such as THI.JANAGI RAMAN, KA.NA.SU,PUDUMAI PITHTHAN etc whose novels also speak about the various facets of love and its impact)the fact remains that all these writers have also portrayed what they have experienced or what they have seen as those experienced by others.In other words there is no finality to any of those views. So long there is going to be human race in existence, the experience that they are going to undergo, love perse, is going to be as varied and complex as one's imagination can go.

I have visited DARGILING in the year after my marriage,i have visited ooty, when i have been blessed with a son and daughter, i have visited Kodai kanal when my children have started moving from child hood to adult hood and recently i had been to Shimla.During these years my love and affection has gone under stress and strain and each time, it has emerged stronger and bolder and i have a sence of joy and fulfillment.And i feel that the issue is one connected with consultaations, compromise, agreements and of course argument too.If there is a basic trust in the
character and capabiliies of the other person then even arguments tend to produce the mutually beneficial results and if there is mis trust then the whol;e word/read as world has become a fiasco.

The lesson that i have learnt so far in trying circumstances is that nothing has always got a permanant meaning,in other words good becomes bad and bad becomes good , tolerance becomes admantness and viceversa and thus every thing is bound to change and shall change over aperiod of time. For those who understand that change is constant, the recognition that the moments of joy and sorrow may not be constant will come.Once that recognition comes, expectations start decreasing. AND ONCE EXPETATIONS ARE ON THE DECLINE THE ACTS OF THE OTHER PERSONS START HAVING declining impact. I remain what i am and i allow the other person to remain what he or she is.In other words i know my levels of freedom and i also respect the freeedom levels of others.WE coexist appreciating each other and their needs. REAL HAPPINESS FILLS THE VOID THEN.

MAY THERE BE PEACE OF MIND AND HAPPINESS PREVAIL FOR ALL AROUND.